Whales, Elephants, Me, and Mollie

My daughter and I are currently on opposites sides of the world and experiencing things that the other has never known. She is in India on her study abroad, and I am in Hawaii on a site inspection. Though worlds apart, there are certain aspects of our experiences that are surprisingly similar.

I am on the beautiful island of Maui and for the past week, have been visiting various hotels, trying the finest restaurants, and enjoying spa visits almost daily (I know…I love certain aspects of my job!) However, the highlight of the week was this morning when I enjoyed a sunrise canoe experience. There were four of us along with our 2 guides and we ventured out at 7am in a traditional Hawaiian canoe. The waves were strong and we were told to paddle hard to make it past the first breakers.  As we came into the open water, the sun began to rise over Haleakala (which means “the house of the rising sun”).  This volcano is the highest point on the island at well over 10,000 feet.  As the sun rose, the sky exploded in orange as did the water reflecting the sun around us. We paddled gently through the orange glowing water and were visited by manta rays, needle fish, and large ocean turtles, as well as a few sightings of hunchback whales which are currently migrating. These huge ocean mammals are amazing creatures. They can measure up to 60 feet long and weigh well over 40 tons. They are perhaps best known for the songs that they sing. These songs, originally mistaken by ancient sailors for the siren calls of mermaids, have been sung for generations. Scientists used to think it was the same song but have realized that it is actually a song that evolves over several years time. While they theorize that the songs are mating calls, nobody really knows for sure – and I for one, believe that there is more in this world that we do NOT know, than we do know so I like to imagine that they may be telling stories to one another, keeping alive their own history. We do know that they exhibit very human tendencies – joy, compassion, extreme care for their offspring and injured in their herd, as well as grief.

While I am paddling through the waters with whales, my daughter, Mollie, is in India preparing for a day to be spent with the largest mammals on land – the elephants.  These creatures are equally amazing and equally “human”. They are known for their intelligence and for their memories. But I am most touched by their expression of grief. When one of their herd passes, the entire herd expresses grief and sorrow. Their posture changes, they hang their heads, they pay homage to their fallen member. And, even years later, when the herd passes the spot where one of their own died years before, they will pause at that spot, as if to give a prayer. I am amazed that these incredibly large creatures can show such tenderness, care and compassion.  I know that Mollie will come home with more knowledge about elephants than I will ever hope to know. She will have walked among them, felt their skin and looked into their eyes, felt a bit of their soul.  I look forward to the time soon when we are both home and can share our experiences with each other and learn a bit from one another.

However, there are moments of each of our experiences that we cannot share, moments of our experience that are fully our own. The color of the water as the sun rose over Haleakala, the smell of the wind as it came off the ocean, the swaying of the canoe as we watched whales breaching nearby – those are moments that I will always remember but are impossible to fully share with anyone else. Just as Mollie’s experiences in India will be fully her own. I will enjoy hearing about them, looking at her pictures, and imagining her there – but only she will know the full truth of each experience.

As we were paddling along the coastline today, the guide said  “It is always better to be paddling, instead of rowing. When you are rowing, you are only looking backwards, but when you paddle, you know where you came from and you know where you are going.”

I hope that you are paddling instead of rowing, and I hope that you are enjoying all your moments along the way.